I can't really remember when was the first time I fell in love with the world of photography. It just struck me one day that I love to take photos and experiment with a lot of perspective to create my very own version of beauty. With each photo that I take, one after the other, I grow along. I learn bit by bit what kind of style suits me best, what's my aesthetic, and how I develop feelings from my photographs. I used to think that to produce amazing photos, I gotta have the most high end camera. Until I realize that I can create beauties even with a simple phone camera. Your camera doesn't define the quality of the photos you take. It's you. It's the emotion that flows through you when you take photos, translated implicitly in the angle, the object, the brightness. It's the way you see the world from behind the lens to create your very own version of reality so others can see it too. I have seen countless people treating DSLR and mirrorless cameras like they're just point and shoot cameras. Now that I've tasted the world of film photography after years playing with DSLR, I can confidently say that it's really a matter of preference. Neither one of them is more superior than the other. Just because it takes more effort, money, and money to develop photos from film rolls doesn't make film photography is more valuable than digital photography. Like I said, it's not the gear, not the camera, not the equipment; it's you.

My first camera was a digital pocket camera. It has 22x zoom and white in color. The depth of field that it created wasn't so bad, but I had to work through it since it was an automatic lens. And then I fell in love with DSLR cameras, because of its manual setting in getting depth of field of your desire. And so I got myself a Canon 600D and went mad over its abillity in shooting pictures. I have always been the digital girl in the camera industry. Who can resist its versatility and customization they offer?

But then I saw my boyfriend, who apparently, not going the same direction as me in photography. Unlike me, he prefers film photography. He might not be the best photographer out there, but something about his film rolls are so enchanting. It has low light, grainy, has greenish and blusih tone in most photos, depth of field is not as strong as mine, etc. And yet... his photos make my heart flutters more than my own photos that are created by DSLR. He kinda challenged me to start snapping photos in film, using one of his camera. I was so giddy, even though it was just a point and shoot camera, but the rush of excitement that runs through my mind knowing that none of us knew how the result would be yet it didn't stop us to keep taking photos. Being used to using DSLR, I focus on the composition of the photo that I take. If I don't like it, I delete it and retake another one. But with films, I learn the mechanics of the camera itself. Because films can get over or underexposed if I set the light meter wrong, or if I shoot in low light surrounding with wrong ISO. Doesn't that sound fun?

So yeah, this is my first ever roll of film that I took using analog camera. I used to have one as well but I threw it away once I got a digital camera. Who knows that film photography would be a thing in the future eh? I really love the excitement of waiting your film to be printed because it really takes a while to see the result. It's the kind of feeling that I don't get with DSLR cameras, and definitely the kind of feeling that will reel me back to film photography. I'm sorry if my photos look weird lol. My composition still sucks. But this camera is so fun to shoot with since you can shoot in two different dimension which means two different moods.

PS: Photos are taken by me. Photos that have me in it, taken by boyfriend!

I would like to say sorry from the deepest of my heart, for not seeing you all those years ago. I should've known—my god I should—that you would be perfect for me. Okay, I know that sounds exaggerating, but I've never been this happier in my life of meeting the love of my life. I know it's so cringeworthy, but I'm in love and I always will be so bear with me, you will have to get used to me being cheesy 24/7 to you.

I know I've hurt you so bad in the past. I've rejected you, ditched you, mocked you, I didn't even look at you when I was your only world. And I should have known that your feelings were genuine. Because if I could turn back time, I'd tell my old self to just take you in.

"This man will make you happy. So happy that you will not question anything."

With you, I feel so enough. I don't even feel like anything in me has changed. Everything is just like how it's supposed to be, only better. You always shower me with the much needed affection, but you never forget to let me walk by myself in rough times. It's like as if we're growing together.

Thank you for the second chance. I will not waste it away.

-kurangdaritiga-

Okay so I know it's super late to write about this now because it's October! The real event took place two months ago! I've had it drafted for a very long time but you know, the down side of actually having a blog is not about the photos, but the writing part. It's hard to find the time for me to just sit down and start typing because university life always takes so much of my time. Not to mention how I'm back in a relationship again now (haha for that!) so majority of my time goes to le boyfriend.

I decided to watch Prambanan Jazz 2017 with my friends on day 3 only. I was chasing after Kahitna, Yovie & Nuno, Tompi, and Glenn Fredly. It's always fun to go to a music festival because you get to sing with the musicians, with your friends, and when they say music unites us all, it's true. It was a record for me to stand 12 hours straight without rest at all. The place was packed with human so I couldn't find a place to sit down and rest my feet. Although I couldn't feel my feet afterwards, I was so happy I could finally see all the musicians I've been in love with for years now. My parents love them too, so it's only natural for me to like them as well. Especially Kahitna and Yovie & Nuno, they accompany my childhood memories.